THIS WILL BE MY YEAR.

yes. and yes.
listing.

The Dream

Bliss.
Nothing wrong, nothing harmful.
There was something there. in the look you gave me.
It made me realize something. I'm going for it.
Thanks.

Not Giving Up

But even when you know you've done the right thing, it doesn't ever seem to be as fulfilling, or gratifying or even, to put it blatantly, as good as you thought it would.
And then you feel let down.
And why shouldn't you give up? It is easier.
You already feel like you have.

Maybe I gave up a long time ago.
And just didn't realize it.

You make me smile

But I'm almost too scared to talk to you.
I can only blame myself for being timid.

Something I found

"The law itself had become unlawful..."
-Will and Ariel Durant

going chemistry.

It's just like going postal.
But worked out down to the atoms.

Why everything is so short

Because when I write stuff that's longer, it just sounds cliche, or stupid, or I just don't like it.
And there's always the problem of commitment to it.
Even that seems a little long.

My Own 13th Letter

Thank you.

you don't get it.

now I don't know what to say to him, to you, to anyone.
happy?

Happenings

or lack thereof

No matter what is said or done
I have no chance.

Sophistication

Your big words and fancy clothing doesn't impress me.

Weary

I can't help it.
You've been a jackass in the past, why change now?

confusion

Several things stay forever in your life.
1 of those is work.
inescapable.

revelations

they might seem stupid now,
But by god they can be powerful.

Equality

No matter how hard I try, I'm not going to be perfect
but neither is anyone else.

11:11

I'll never doubt your magic again.

Breakfast

silently, methodically, and gracefully she opens the cabinet, and searches.
She finds her cereal, grabs a bowl and pours some out into a pristine white bowl.
She opens the fridge to find no milk. and no good substitutes.
Taking a spoon and sitting down in front of the television she watches a cooking show.
Oh the irony.
The cereal is incredibly dry, but she is persistent, and she eats it.

Next she raids the refrigerator, gaining only a almost empty carton of orange juice.
Procuring a glass from the cupboard she opens the carton, and pours a large glass of the juice.
She takes a long gulp of it, which immediately quenches her thirst, only for it to come back with a vengeance a second later.

Indigo

Between blue and violet lies the outcast of the rainbow.

Cool

I used to think cool was a combination of being arrogant, not caring, liking material things, being fashionable, and being able to make people laugh at the flip of a coin.
I was wrong.
Cool, well to put it incredibly simply, doesn't exist. doesn't matter.
Whenever I see one of those "how to be popular" books, I laugh at it. I smirk at it. I think of how wrong it is.
Cool isn't important
the ability to be happy yourself and make those around you happy is exceedingly.
And that is something I strive for.

Chipped Nail Polish

I wear it as a trophy

Ode to Chem

Oh Chemistry.
How I love you.
How you fascinate me.
How you perplex me.
If only you knew that.
Maybe then you would take mercy on me.
Maybe then you wouldn't give as much homework.
Maybe then I wouldn't have to study for your tests.
Oh Chemistry.

The hate.

All of a sudden the anger surged through me.
Uncontrolable.
I am not used to this.
My eyes narrowed.

My breathing lapsed.
A seizure of hate.
Caused by... you.
But you are not the cause.

My muscles tightened.
My head turned slowly.
Teeth gritted.
I can't find the words to describe my discomfort.

It sent shivers down my spine.

It stings.